Okay... Here's that deleted post, hidden over here like a bastard retard

I've always been skittish about reposting any of the following here. I thought it was a funny, if ludicrously over-the-top, slam on Scandanavians. I thought I could get away with use of N-word, because I clearly wasn't using it to refer to blacks.

I was "recontextualizing" it.

I really felt strange and on dangerous ground in using the word, but I justified it according to my first principle, You Can't Fight The Funny.

And, of course, one couldn't make proper fun of Europeans without accusing all of their men of being homosexuals to one degree or another.

At any rate, this screed resulted because we had several Norwegian and Danish and whatever posters who were always offering the Northern European view on American foreign policy, as if anyone gave a shit. The final insult came when they began posting flags of their useless countries in a thread about the war.

So, I decided to ban all further references to any of these countries in the thread.

Remember-- this was all over-the-top, shock-value joking with people I had long known and (sort of) liked. Still, I thought it was funny then, and I think it's funny now... although it's on the edge of being, well, offensive.

Guys,

Enough with the faggity flags of meaningless scandanavian duchies, okay?

...

In fact, no further mention of Denmark, Norway, Iceland, Finland, Sweden, or, fuck it, the Netherlands or Belgium, will be tolerated here.

If one of these countries is important in the news -- Ha, ha, hah, hah, hah, hypothetically I mean -- refer to the country vaguely like they refer to colleges in Penthouse Letters, i.e., "a small meaningless ice-bound country with a high suidice rate" or "a meaningless, no-account frostberg populated entirely by blonde Aryan Viking-Nazi communist homosexual Ice Niggers."

...

And when did all of these (ha, hah) "Vikings" all decide to go bi?

All these latter-day Northern European men are just one and a half tabs of ecstasy from giving a blowjob to their Barcelonan flatmate/DJ/drug-pusher.

These fucking countries... Christ, characters in a Brett Easton Ellis gay porn novel laugh at these European "men."

...

The whole continent of Europe has decided to "experiment" with a bit of homosexuality. Every banker, teamster, waiter, policeman, politician you see in Europe-- each of them has had another guy's finger up his ass, if not in the recent past, then at least during a university meth party.

What the fuck is that? When did the men of an entire fucking continent think to themselves, "You know what I wouldn't mind a bit of right now? Cock."

EDIT: Oh, I'm sorry. They would have said, "You know what I'd fancy right now? Cock."

Fancy.

Kind of gives the fucking game away, don't it now?

...

I'd fancy it if all of these blonde Viking-Nazi polymorphously perverse Aryan Ice Niggers would just build themselves a giant wooden shoe boat and sail it to the fucking North Pole.


There they could happily spend the rest of their useless lives putting on raves featuring bad Frankfurtian techno-pop and really bad Oslovian rappers and pop X pills and perform gay analingus on Santa's elves while collecting outrageous welfare benefits.

...

"Hey, Horst, wouldst du liken to climben die Matterhorn mit me?"

-- "Ach, du lieber, you betten your arsen I would Horst. But first, let us inject some crystal meth directly into each other's colons and then produce a really bad ironic-disco house E.P. together."

..................

Man, I still think that's funny -- if you take it in the right way -- but I hope that no one gets too offended by it.

Shock value, guys. There's a special exception for going clearly over-the-top.

Or at least I think and hope there is.

Or let me offer this defense: Like Ice-T and Eminem, I was "just playing a character."